Weert to the Max.

(Disclaimer: I'm uploading this from a MacDonalds WiFi, it's to slow to upload photo's.  I will do so when I have a chance.  For now, just use your imagination.)

Hullo all

The above image is a panorama from the top of the church at Weert, my mothers home town.  The happy chap on the left is Wesley, a fabulous fellow who treated the younger members of the congregation to a night on the town, dutch style.  

When I last left you, I had spent one day in Holland at a family friends house, so I will continue with stories that have happened after that.  The very next day, we were driven from Helmont, (the family friends home town) to Weert (pronounced Wi-ert) and met up with the rest of the family, a total of 32 people.  We were (and are) staying at a hotel called the Golden Tulip, where basically half the hotel is Van Lieshouts.  As before, our first day was spent getting settled and having a look around town.  The second was where the adventure really starts.

It was decided that the family would take a nice bicycle ride around the south Netherlands.  For those of you who don't know, Holland is literally the flattest place on earth, so it's perfect for cycling, and EVERYONE does it, all the time, everywhere.  We discovered quickly that the nearby bike hire place couldn't provide enough bikes (i guess he doesn't get 35 person families every day).  A few calls later and we found a place, the next village over, that had the required number.  A short train trip and some bicycle related confusion later,  we were on our way.  

Now, I know from experience how difficult it is to get a group of people to do anything, like order pizza or walk through a door.  So imagine trying to get a large group of related people to agree on how to cycle across Holland.  The first hour was ride 10 meters, stop for 20 meters to argue about where to go.  Just as Kat and I decided to just go our own way and meet them eight hours later at the Hotel, they seemed to get their act together and we picked up the pace.  Soon enough, we had got through the congested (though cute) city center and were riding through Dutch countryside consisting of brussel sprout farms, prancing deer (delicious) and quiet northern European forest roads. 

We stopped for morning tea at a little country style inn, and promptly ate her entire supply of Vlaai, (which is a type of Dutch fruit tart, similar to apple pie), to the great disappointment of the next group of visitors.  By the way, Vlaai was the only thing she served.  OH SNAP.

The ride continued, punctuated by short busts of interest.  I’ll put these in bullet form for ease of digestion.

-Kat getting electrocuted by an electric fence after stealing a pear and apple from a farm.  I also stole them, but was unharmed.  I’m just not very conductive, it seems.

-Rain appearing, then leaving, returning again, and generally spending the rest of the day not sure what to do, though it rained enough for us to get pretty wet.  Except for mum, who brought a raincoat.  Clever.

-Every time a car would appear as a distant speck on the horizon, shrill screams of “CAAAAAAR!!! STICK TO THE RIGHT!” from one of my more over protective relatives.  This would be repeated, at increasing volume and frequency as the offending vehicle inched closer.  This was often on a basically deserted road, wide enough for a semi trailer.  Shockingly, no one was killed.

-Somehow missing lunch, and arriving home at 3:30.  I had thus far narrowly avoided resorting to cannibalism by chewing on mandrake roots and unripe mulberries, which were as bitter as they sound.  I quickly found the nearest inn and ordered a beer and a burger.  That too, was as good as it sounds.

We then basically chilled in our hotel until dinner, when we decided to eat downstairs at the “Wok in Weert”, an all you can eat stir fry and teppanyaki bar.  The buffet of choosing your ingredients for the chef to stir fry was awesome, though I didn’t brave the kangaroo meat, helpfully labelled “Skippy”.  No, I’m not making that up.  After that, a few episodes of 30 Rock on cable (The one where Liz is going out with the guy in a bubble, from Mad Men.) and sleep.

Eight AM breakfast of more unusual (though tasty) bacon and we had a full day of touring Weert, including climbing the Weert church, visiting the town center, the school attended by many of my relatives old school and the house where my grandmother raised 13 children.  This was still owned by the lady my grandmother sold it too in 1969, over fifty years ago.  She graciously opened it for us to look at, and we spotted the place where a four year old John Van Lieshout carved his name into a beam. 

Some local family friends who have stayed with us, (by us I mean various Vans) were throwing a BBQ for us that night.  We drank beer from the tap, lots of wine, ate dutch salads, homemade sausages, sang to traditional Limburg songs and danced like the Dutch, that is to say, not very well, but with heart.  A famous Limburg singer came and sang a few songs for our family, including a special love song for the newlyweds (us).  By about nine thirty, everyone was pretty sloshed, including Kat and my whole family. 

The BBQ wound up at ten, but the younger crowd (myself, Kat, my sister Michelle, my cousins Anna, Tim, Andrew and Tanya and our new friend Wesley, whose parents owned the house we BBQ’d in.  We decided to meet at 12 in the hotel foyer for to sample the local nightlife, and passed the time alternating between Jack Daniels and coke and vodka and contrieu shots in the hotel bar.  To tell the truth, the rest of the night is a bit of a blur.  I remember beating both Andrew and Tanya at pool, Kat getting a free stein of beer through means that as her husband, I’d probably rather not know about,  tequila shots, more beer, dancing and general havoc.  We finally called it a night at 3:30, walked back to the hotel and crashed, hard. 

We had a few more days in Weert, in which we had some fun activities like shooting 18kg rifles that shoot enormous lead pellets at tiny little black squares and lots of walking around churches and towns.  Our final night was spent at another big family dinner, this time in the old Mint, which had been converted into a pub.  The double Brewed Beef Tea was a standout, and EVERYTHING is served with Belgian style chips and whole egg mayonnaise.  Awesome, I don’t even need to ask.

So tomorrow we pack up for the boats, where we begin our adventures on the Dutch Canals, sailing up to Amsterdam, then Edam (of the cheese renown) and to Gouda (er, also famous for cheese.  The Dutch love their cheese.) 

So tune in next time for the next instalment of the adventures of the Ferro’s, Waterworld-style!