A Wretched Hive of Scum and Villainy

Ridiculous levels of busy since we got to Amsterdam, dear reader.  I’ll get to that in a moment, after a brief recap of the last few days.

We left the family boats on Monday in Gouda and caught a train to Den Haag, where we had a hotel room booked for one night before going to Amsterdam until we hopped on another train to Munich on the 1^st.  Unfortunately, the hotel wasn’t really in Den Haag at all, but in a small beach town to the North called Noordijk.  Who knows why the hell anyone would want a beach town on the sands of the freezing waters of the North Sea, but the Dutch do strange things sometimes.  Did I mention that it’s not far off winter here? Guess what is going on in the freezing cold, raining, off-season version of the Gold Coast?  The answer is nothing, nothing at all.  Even the tourist office basically said so, and they are supposed to make this place look good.  On the plus side, the hotel had free wifi, so I downloaded season five of Futurama, Spartacus and the new Dexter and 30 Rock and some music.  The other two good things that happened were a Sand Castle Building Competition (It was over, but the sculptures still stood.) and Kat and I wandering around on a Monday night for an hour and finding the best damn Thai place in Holland.  Seriously, My-Thai quality here people.  So when you’re in Noordijk next, hit em up.  You’ll have to find them though, I don’t remember the name. Sorry.  Next morning we bussed it no nearby Leiden, (very cute), sighsaw for a few hours (Windmill Museum, haircut for me, 14^th  century Citadel closed for repairs) and trained to Amsterdam. 

So Amsterdam is quite a blast.  Our hotel is literally one street from the red light district, which means we’re basically close to everything.  Not twenty meters from where I am right now, there’s a Chinese, Italian, Indonesian and French restaurant, a bar that has been selling booze to visitors since 1530, coffee shops that don’t sell any coffee or coffee related products, red windows with ladies of the evening in them and so, so, so many sex shops, you have no idea.  After we checked into our small but functional room, we had ribs for dinner and took a guided tour of the red light, which concluded with a Jagermeister shot for each of us (of which I took both), followed but visiting various bars and downing much beer (for me) and wine (for kat).  By midnight we were feeling somewhat tipsy and decided to catch a show.  I can’t tell you too much about that since various parties read this blog (Hi, Joanne!) but suffice to show, it was an eye opening experience.  (http://www.casarosso.nl, NSFW) We stumbled home at about 3am and collapsed into bed. 

Today, in contrast with our night of decadence and sin the night before, we were beacons of culture and refinement.  Our morning started with a visit to the Amsterdam flea markets, where I totally lucked out and found the absolute most awesomest, coolest jacket every to grace gods green earth.  It’s brown suede with cream and orange trim, beautifully made and like new.  I immediately purchased it for the meagre sum of forty euro, put it on and refuse to take it off.  Even now, as I sit in bed typing this, it sits proudly draped over a chair, magnificent in its splendour.  I shall call it “William III, Prince of Orange” or Willy for short. 

Our Lonely Planet had told us that every Wednesday at lunch there was a free half hour concert at the Concertgebou, which was about a 45 minute walk from our hotel.  We could have caught the tram, but Kat and I prefer to walk, it’s definitely the best way to take in the sights and sounds of a new, foreign city, free and helps burn off the calories from all the frittes and mayonnaise.  Over 800 000 people visit the Concertgebou each year, making it the busiest concert hall in the world, and is reputed to have the best acoustics.  It certainly sounded good to me.  After lunch (A Fatboy burger with sauerkraut and mustard) we visited the Rejkmuseum, the home to many of Rembrandts most famous pieces including The Night Watch, The Jewish Couple and Jan Six, as well as many other famous artists like Hal, and many of Rembrants pupils.  It was fantastic; there is something about seeing these works of art in person that cannot be captured in photographs.  For example, Rembrandt used a technique of using thick paint on areas that he wanted to shine, as the light would reflect off the thicker paint and create an almost metallic effect.  Also amazing was the minutely detailed model of the ship Prins Willem, which sat in the entrance of the Dutch Admiralty for over two hundred years, each canon and piece of rigging perfectly positioned.  No photos, unfortunately.  It was late afternoon by this stage, and our last stop was a Microbrewery called “De Brouwerij”.  I tried to get Kat to drink a whole 200ml of delicious, handmade wheat bear (the mildest of the beers) but she only managed about half that, leaving it to me to polish off the rest, as well as my Spicy Amber Ale and Traditional Pils, though she did help with the salami and cheese.  I’m sure she’ll be fine in a few days with a litre stein of hardcore German Pilsner.  Sure she will.  Italian for dinner and bed, which is where I am now.  Last day in Holland tomorrow, having a much quieter one than today, with only the Ann Frank house, the Royal Palace, more frittes’ (chips) and touring a Diamond factory.  Sleep time now though, goodnight all.